Monday, August 4, 2014

Monday Retro Review: Eight Legged Freaks

There was a time when David Arquette was a box office draw (kinda), Scarlett Johansson was relatively unknown, and Kari Wuhrer starred in a TV show called Sliders. During this wondrous era, a giant spider movie called Eight Legged Freaks came out, and it starred all of them. But was it good? Stick with me!

A variety of horrible, poisonous spiders get exposed to a noxious chemical that causes them to grow to  monumental proportions. Then they attack a small town.

Eight Legged Freaks is a B-movie about giant spiders attacking a small town. It doesn't take itself seriously at all. It stars David Arquette. 'Nuff said.

It helps if you like cheesy, B-grade monster movies made by a major studio with a decent budget. Everything is played more for laughs than scares, and the violence is largely committed off screen or against giant spiders. This is meant to be a fun movie. No more, no less. And it is, right down to the comical sounds the spiders make.

It's also fun seeing Johansson as a bad-girl teenager and Kari Wuhrer -- who should have been a much bigger star -- run around in a tight, white shirt. Arquette is Arquette. The spiders kill people. You get what you pay for.

Yeah, I don't sound too enthusiastic about catching Eight Legged Freaks again, but that doesn't mean I didn't enjoy it. I did. The fact is, I knew what I was getting going into with this flick, and I enjoyed it on that level. I'll watch this again when I'm in the mood for giant spider movie, so that means this is a Good. I'm just not surprised by that fact.

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