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The Month of Horror Day 28: Eden Lake

Basement contributor Matt Bellamy has taken it upon himself to watch and review at least one horror movie a day for the month of October . . . because he's awesome that way! Warning: tonight's installment will make your boil over with Bellamy-like rage.

I'm already beginning to boil with rage just thinking about this movie again, I'll try not to lash out too much during this review but no promises! My anger does not stem from the quality of this film at all, by the way but because I hate so much of what is represented throughout it. I have never experienced such visceral reactions to a movie before in my life and I felt like I needed to go for a walk or hit a punching bag afterwards, it got to me that badly! I never knew I held such venom and contempt towards a-hole kids before, you know, the ones with absolutely zero respect or regard for authority or their elders. The kinds of kids we unfortunately see too much of these days who think they're the cock-of-the-walk and don't care what they do, or to whom they do it to, even if it's harmful.

Okay, Matt, breathe. Don't go down that road too far; let's get back to the movie, shall we? Now, believe it or not, I'm a romantic at heart so maybe that's why I was so furious over the events that take place throughout the duration of 'Eden Lake'. I'm a romantic and I like seeing stories where a nice guy like Michael Fassbender takes his kindergarten teacher girlfriend out to the lake with the intention of proposing to her. Isn't that sweet? They seem like such a genuine and loving couple, too. Obviously, I was aware this was a horror/thriller before getting into it so of course something bad was going to happen, I was ready for that. I was not however ready for me to loathe the characters causing trouble for this nice couple as much as I ended up doing. These stupid brats, who are all too real in our world, decide to create a living hell for our newly engaged couple for absolutely no reason other than their own amusement. They steal their car, laughing about it the whole time amongst themselves, wreck it and figure they've done enough damage and would hate to get into trouble with their parents or the law so they decide "what the hell, let's just try to kill these two, that'll be a good time". SO MUCH ANGER!

I will not go into any more story details because the impact from some of the gut punches delivered throughout should be experienced without spoilers of any kind but be aware there is a very good chance you will yell at your screen on more than one occasion. Villains like this exist. They are not unstoppable, machete wielding, hockey mask wearing mad men. They do not come to claim your life while you're dreaming. They're not ghosts, werewolves, zombies or vampires. Instead, they live in your neighbourhood. They ride the bus. They sit in movie theatres with you. Maybe they even go to school with your own children who hopefully are not on the same path. Teens who simply do not care, who have been raised improperly, or whose group of friends they chum around with are a bunch of sociopathic misanthropes. You hear stories on the news about kids like these, who would douse a sleeping homeless man with lighter fluid or gasoline and set him on fire. Torture and kill innocent and defenseless animals. Maybe even commit murder without blinking an eye.

That's it, I need to go for a walk. If you plan on watching 'Eden Lake', I hope you know what you're in for.
 

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