Friday, August 23, 2013

Jason and Shawn versus Hatchet III

Jason: Hatchet III might very well be the greatest movie ever made. Sure, there's better movies. More award-worthy movies. Classics that stand the test of time. But Hatchet III knows what it is, knows what its fans want to see, and delivers on every count. Few movies can say that, especially those pretentious Academy Award movies. I spit on them. Hatchet III gives us the goods. It shows us all the kills, all the gore. There's humour here too, although not as much as the first two movies. But who cares? I've bought it already. I will watch it again and again. Hatchet III is a Good and then some.

Shawn: Sometimes a movie can tick all a dude's boxes on a day that fits whatever mood he's in. Today, that movie is Hatchet III. Sometimes I say (without going all gore porn like Saw) "show us the damn head stomp, show us the ripping in half"'s soooo frustrating when a movie doesn't. That said, there is a line between gore porn and necessary slaughter. A movie like this is necessary slaughter. Not gross, just....necessary.
I was completely satisfied at the end of this movie, I practically needed a fucking cigarette! I can only say....

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