Review: Abominable (2020)

Bigfoot and the Yeti are poorly served in horror movies. Yeah, people make movies about them, but they're rarely any good. I did enjoy Ryan Schifrin's Abominable back in 2006, but I can't recall a good Bigfoot movie since.

Wait... Big Legend! I sit correctly.

Sadly, Jamaal Burden doesn't give us the Bigfoot movie we wanted here in The Basement. There is some decent gore, I'll give it that. Otherwise this flick is pure junk. I wasn't even able to appreciate it on the so-bad-it's-good level.

Where to begin? Well, and at risk of getting all pretentious, this is supposed to be the Himalayan Mountains, but it looks like the forest behind my house. The creature is a guy in a rubber-fat suit wearing a Halloween mask. The expression doesn't change, which renders this Yeti/Bigfoot the most offending mouth breather ever.

Performances? They range from serviceable to scenery chewing to almost catatonic. The direction and cinematography are equally so.

But the worst aspect in this movie is the length. The film is a scant hour and 11 minutes, and that's with credits on either end. We're dropped right into the action, which is fine, but it soon becomes clear someone cut out the entire opening of the movie. Like the first act where all the characters and story are introduced.

Now, I might be wrong on that. And if I am, this is the worst written movie in history. We get no sense of who the characters are. Some appear on screen like we're supposed to know them, and why their eye was ripped out, but we've never seen them before. I'm thinking Uncork'd Entertainment realized they had a turd on their hands, cut out all but the essential stuff, and released Abominable in hope of earning some coin back.

I don't think they will, because Shawn and I are pretty undemanding, and we were still left cold by Abominable, pun intended. This one's an Ugly. I don't even think boobies could've saved it.

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