Saturday, January 21, 2012

Jason and Shawn review: The Innkeepers and The Amityville Haunting

The Innkeepers

Shawn: The Innkeepers is a long, drawn out movie with a decent payoff in the end. Not the best, but decent. I would not be a ghost hunter if I was afraid of everything and used a huffer for asthma. And I would not comb my hair like Tintin if I wanted to be taken seriously by anyone on earth. I also wouldn't have recognized the old lady as the hot chick from Top Gun if Jay hadn't of said anything. There is some creepy stuff in parts though and it's better than some scary movies I've seen. I wouldn't own it or watch it again, so it's a Bad.

Jason: If you're in the mood for a deliberately paced, slow-burn ghost story then this is the movie for you. No gore or rapid-fire editing here, just old-school film making and scares. Writer/director Ti West does a great job setting things up and paying them off later, as long as you're paying attention. I really liked the characters in this movie. Claire, Luke, Leanne. They are all well written and well cast. The movie works because we get to know and like them. This isn't a film for everyone, but those who like subtle horror will like it a lot. I will watch this again. A Good from me!

The Amityville Haunting

Shawn: I might buy the Amityville house if I knew what happened in it, but I wouldn't live there. And I would not make my wife live there if she was opposed to it. When my kids started to act weird -- bye bye house! These are the worst good parents I've ever seen. In fact, this movie sucks all kinds of goat ass. I've seen excellent found-footage movies and this is erasing them from my memory like some kind of infectious disease. There are some goosebumply moments, but shorts shitting this is not. Bad.

Jason: I was going to give this latest Asylum offering an Ugly for setting a movie in the infamous Amityville house without actually bothering to make the house they used look anything like it. But The Asylum profits off of name brands, so you can't really fault them for being them. And there are boobies and blood within the first five minutes, so at least they tried. But the film isn't scary and the scene where the dad has a nervous breakdown is more comical than powerful. And the bits where the camera blacked out got on my nerve. A lot. This is a Bad movie without a doubt, but what else can we expect from The Asylum?

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